Maybe I’ll keep this thing around, because it may just come in handy, like it does now.

RANT

I know this is not negotiable, putting your happiness before everyone else’s, but, is that considered selfish? As someone who always puts everyone else before me, I have finally found a situation where I just NEEDED to be taken care of before I needed to take care of someone else. But it came at a costly price. I was called selfish (in not so many words) and I stopped and thought about it. Was that being selfish? Maybe, but probably not in the way it sounds. Selfish has a negative connotation to it, mostly pertaining to material possessions and egoism, but last night, that wasn’t the case. I put needs and emotions before me on the table and pick and chose which ones needed to be addressed.

But in that situation, I saw someone crumble because of me. I saw this person fall apart at my expense, and I second guessed myself for a minute. Was putting myself first really what I needed? Or was this person just guilt tripping me so I would put him first. I walked out the door and felt so horrible because I had hurt him so bad. I almost walked back into the door and took back everything I said. So me putting myself first, is that being selfish or not?

/RANT

Rant - No Comments »

I’m not sure how much longer I’m going to keep doing this blogging thing. Not that I have a lot to write about, and not that many people read this but over the last few weeks, every time I’ve gotten on here to blog, nothing has come up. My life isn’t interesting, at all, so there’s really no need to keep this up.

I have a lot going on for the next few weeks, I’m going on vacation at the end of the week for a few days, and then I’m taking part in a production for the theatre company I work for, and then I’m going to teach a week of summer camp for theatre, so things are going to be quite busy. We’ll see where this site goes afterward.

Personal - 1 Comment »

There hasn’t been much going on since my return. I started my internship and I have to say, I’m not that happy with it. Sort of makes me want to rethink this whole career path. Some of it is good, but other parts are horrendous and I keep procrastinating work for it. I feel like a telemarketer. I only go into the office once a week, but I feel like I’m walking on egg shells when I’m there because of the horrible side of work. I don’t like it. At all. The Artistic Director asked me to act in a 10 minute play for a play writing seminar later in July, which I don’t want to do at all, but how can I say no? I’m also teaching a summer camp course on Shakespeare in August for this too. That won’t be so bad but I’ve been wrong about stuff before.

Last night I went and saw Iron Man again in theaters. It’s only the second time I’ve seen it, it was my boyfriend’s third time seeing it. We’re big geeks. I know. I worked all day yesterday, and then I went to frisbee, which was not a good idea because my feet were already sore enough, and then with frisbee, I spend 2 hours running all around a soccer field. But yeah, after, we went back to his house, changed into non-smelly clothes and went out to dinner and then to the movies. We were both exhausted when the movie let out but it was worth it to see it again. We saw previews for The Dark Knight and I have to say, I’m going to see it July 18th at midnight. I am so freaking excited for this movie!!

I’m missing a lot of other details but I can’t be bothered right now.

Career, Movies - 2 Comments »